I was taken hostage by bears. I know it sounds crazy, but it’s true. I was minding my own business, walking along, when a great big brown bear walked up behind me, and pawed my head to the ground. I had always heard that I should play dead when attacked by bears, which I did. Well, I mean I was knocked unconscious, so that made it easier. The bears then apparently dragged me back to their cave. I didn’t really understand what they wanted from me, and when I woke up they were surrounding me. They all became excitable when my eyes opened. Normally, this would be fine, but since these were bears, their excitement quickly turned to violence. I had no choice but to join the fight. After I took down one bear, the rest of them came after me, and I really had no defense. So as they clobbered me into unconsciousness again, I rested easy knowing my mind was still in tact. That’s when they took my brains out. Now being the simple man I was, I had nothing in my brain that I needed. So, losing it meant nothing to me. They eventually replaced it with a pinecone, smeared in honey to help it stick. That new brain gave me just the right amount of smarts to get out of there. When the bears finally went back to sleep, I ran out of the cave and got to the nearest hospital. With blood and honey dripping from my skull, the hospital staff was disturbed and scared of my current state. As they opened the skull casing to find a pinecone, the horror they expressed was palpable. I assured them I was fine and that they should just pop in a new brain and I would be good to go. It wasn’t so easy. Apparently this hospital doesn’t have a dozen spare brains sitting around. So instead they jammed a few sponges in and sent me to city general, the big city hospital with all the brains. When I showed up, they threw up all over the floor. I tossed them a few sponges out of my head to clean up and went on to surgery. Turns out they weren’t ready, and I had to be put on a waiting list. So with nothing to do while waiting, I decided to head down to the 7-11 and pick up a couple snacks. I loves me a Slurpee™, so I grabbed one of those and took a super long and fast drink and amazingly, I had no brain freeze! Since there’s nothing to freeze! I was pumped, I could drink 10 Slurpees™ now with NO side effects! So awesome. Then I needed some meat, so grabbed one of them microwaveable burritos. As I placed the burrito in the mic, and started it up, I could feel a small pulse in my cranial area. The pulse suddenly turned into an insane amount of pressure, and my head exploded!! Yow! That hurted! I quickly jammed the burrito down the remaining throat pipe and headed back to the hospital. When they saw my body hobbling down the corridor, the palpable horror from earlier seemed like a gentle breeze. Suddenly, Reginald, the brown bear who I took down earlier, was there standing before me. As he ripped me from limb to limb, I realized I never completed the task I was sent out for. I was supposed to destroy bear-kind once and for all, so I guess they were justified. Funny how life goes, huh?
Get Ready…
Get ready folks, it’s about to get real. Ok, not really. Blah blah blah bleep glorp gloop glop. See, I’m still here, no worse for the wear. OK, but let’s get ready for one thing, and that is, more reviews. We are like a month and a half away from finishing this year, and I still have tons of CD’s to share with you. But, it’s all leading up to that great moment, the moment when I reflect on the albums of the year. Oh, you all are just chomping at the bit for that moment! But you’ll just HAVE TO WAIT!! Rock.
Julianna Raye – Dominoes – *** – A bit of bossa nova from Julianna, who always has something interesting to offer. This album sounds great and instantly captures the bossa nova mood, while still having the Julianna Raye stamp in the lyrics and melodies, that kind of a bit of darkness with the light.
Elle Macho – Es Potencial! – **** – A top notch set of songs, which I hope shed light on even more we may be hearing from this band! I think it is a perfect blend of a blast of power, some rock bravado, while still maintaining a interesting and unique sound. It’s awesome.
Dennis Diken with Bell Sound – Late Music – ***1/2 – Good, Beach Boy/Beatlesque blend of power pop, keeping alive that wonderful sound. I think shows that the template can be used if done with skill and thought. Diken does this brilliantly with this album.
They Might Be Giants – Here Comes Science – ***1/2 – Another fantastic addition to the TMBG kids album collection. This time, dealing with science, which I think even us oldsters can learn from. It’s amazing how many scientific facts we don’t really think about much, that are still interesting and good info to know. Oh, and the music is cool and fun too!
Brandi Carlile – Give Up The Ghost – ***1/2 – I know I say this about a lot of people, but you can’t go wrong with Brandi Carlile. Each album brings something different and interesting, while sticking with the formula that makes it work. I think this album explores a bit more with some more upbeat songs and kind of is a bit of a lighter touch, not quite as heavy as the last one.
Why oh why?
Well, here we are, the last two months of the year. It seems like we just got into this year, but so it goes, right? So, now, we are going to really kick start this year, and live it up in 2009!! Oh yeah! Let’s make this year HAPPEN!! OK, whatevs… just read some reviews, OK?
Robbert Bobbert and his Bubble Machine – Robbert Bobbert and his Bubble Machine – ***1/2 – The transition from “adult” music to “kids” music is not a huge stretch for Robert Schneider – his band The Apples in Stereo create simple and fun pop music. Changing the lyrics from grown-up stuff like love and junk, to cool songs about baby animals, super heroes, and just fun, is a welcome change to me! If I had kids, I would force them to listen to this, but since I don’t, I will FORCE YOU TO!
Works Progress Administration – WPA – *** – Good set of songs from this collective, featuring Glen Phillips, Sara and Sean Watkins, etc. For the most part, slow and country-tinged songs, very engaging and beautiful.
Pete Yorn & Scarlett Johansson – Breakup – ***1/2 – A fantastic CD from these two, better than either of their most recent albums, I think. It has a nice energy, and is not trying to hard. So it comes off as effortless, fun, and cool.
Mika – The Boy Who Knew Too Much – ***1/2 – I think I may even like this one better than the first. There seems to be a more focused production style on this one. So it’s more consistent, yet still has the great moments and sounds from that first record. I think we’ll be hearing a lot more good stuff from Mika!
Maxi Dunn – Welcome To Soonville – *** – A good collection of songs, very thoughtful pop music. I especially like the tracks with the guys from Cokeroque, who add a bit of of their flavor to the songs. Maxi is a good songwriter, and has a nice voice as well.
